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October 29, 2005
Creation, Communication, and Interaction
I was just posting on a few message boards about Thursday's episodes of "Smallville" and "Everwood". I found things that were really good; indeed I thought the "Everwood" episode was downright great in a season where each episode has bested the previous one. But the thing that fascinated me was the variety of opinions, the passion of feeling involved. It's been a while since I've experienced that with either show because it's been a while since they've accomplished anything particularly rousing. And when entertainment connects with an audience, it creates a community. That's the thing that draws me to being a film critic. That conversation between me and the film — the reader too.
I'd only gotten to my shows now because on Thursday, almost immediately after learning that I'd been diagnosed with Hepatitis, I went with a close childhood friend to a packed free screening of The Exorcist. The film is decades old, but the surround sound was perfect, the scares dead on. It's the only time I've ever seen a horror movie make a sizable portion of the audience visibly jump. That's the true power of cinema, the interaction between the audience and what's on the screen. That's where the magic comes from.
And that's why I create. Because in a life where my friends are virtually limited to the ones I've had for years and I spend vast stretches alone, it's one of my last most dependable avenues to connect in new and exciting ways.
And that, John, is why I'm here at college instead of rooming with you and having a much better go of things. Because this environment is expanding my ability to create and communicate. Each thing I write refines my craft and the closer I get to competent, the closer I get to feeling complete. People always come first in the long term and I never forget or stop missing those I love when I'm not with them. But if there's any hope for me finding a full and happy life, I need to learn how to not only do this stuff, but do it well. It provides such low-key moments of such extraordinary joy.
  posted by Adam at 04:31 | 0 comments

October 20, 2005
Paths of Life
Talking with Darren tonight, I realized that my life is still very much astray of where I want it to be. It's a strong statement of what I've experienced this past year that this fact neither frightens me nor intimidates me. Like so many things, the problem is merely a series of obstacles that need to be overcome one by one. Whether it becomes overwhelming widely depends on whether I choose to do from here. The me that exists now has options, hopes and dreams. I feel like I'm building from an internal person that has coalesced into bedrock. The whole world may shatter around me, but anything short of all out depression will maintain that sense of who I am, what makes me Adam. My thoughts drift to home too often now. This week's about seeing what I can do to combat that. Life is a community.
  posted by Adam at 03:40 | 0 comments

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Adam
Freelance Film Critic Albany, NY Boston, MA Contact me


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